"How to confuse a Judge legally?"

Uncle Pat once was caught stealing at supermarket.He went to his nephew Romeo to get an advice as he was an attorney.

Pat:Do you know the court setup?

Romeo: I have never been in court.

Pat:The court is composed of  police,prosecutor,

secretary,the assessors and the Judge.

They will ask some questions.

The first strategy is to annoy them legally.

Romeo: How?

Pat: Firstly a statement will be read by the prosecutor to you.Pretend to listen carefully then when you are asked whether you understand the charges which are laid to you,point at  your ears with your mingle finger and don't say anything just

point your ears and shake your head.

Romeo:What will happen then?

Pat:They will try to raise the volumes.

They will read the charges again.

You will be asked again and point your ears again.

At that time the Prosecutor, Secretary and the Judge will be outraged.They won't beat you.

The case will be postponed to another date.

When you meet again.

Use a very strange language.

Romeo:Which language?

Pat: Anything like: Bad boot bare be boo bye no

be ball be boogaloo big ball bad bum-bum bump

bump Booz buzz boss be be big bare buddies book bill bare.

Romeo:I will not remember all of that.

Pat:Use your own innovation but to all what I have  said,there is a catch.

Romeo: What will be the catch?

Pat:You might be send  to a mental hospital and eat vegetables,get medication and tranquilizers.

Romeo:Mmmmmh I don't want that.

Pat: Another alternative,you might be transferred to the Detention Center.

Romeo: What happens  in the Detention Center?

Pat:It depends on the mood of the Detainers.

When you don't give what they want,you can be severely beaten.